just enter your email address below to get this blog's updates, news, and more!6 Keys to Getting Paid for Being You: An Anti-Career Guide
"Don’t worry about what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive and do that. Because what the world needs are people who have come alive."
-Howard Thurman
In the song "My Roller Coaster," singer/songwriter Kimya Dawson recalls her mom saying "I hope someday you get paid for being Kimya Dawson." Here’s the song if you want to listen:
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Given how some parents encourage children to adopt unwanted professions or identities, Kimya’s mother’s statement is powerful. Kimya’s mother hoped she would get paid just for being Kimya. Kimya now gets paid for playing anti-folk concerts across the U.S. and for being her beautifully quirky and authentic self (you may have heard her 6 songs on the Juno soundtrack).
In a world of increasing competition and economic downturns, we’re working more hours for less pay, taking fewer vacation hours, and generally burning out. Perhaps this explains the popularity of alternative career books, stay-at-home jobs, and psychiatric medications. The societally scripted routes to success are failing us.
Here are 6 keys to getting paid for being you:
- Realize Your Potential: Everyone has grown up in a specific place in time, has had unique experiences and perspectives, and is singularly qualified to solve specific problems and make unique contributions. Everyone has something lying dormant within them that stands to come alive and wreak havoc upon the world in beautiful ways. Whether they know it or not, everyone has something that: (1) they can be passionate about, (2) they can do better than anyone else in the world, and (3) is so inherently valuable that others would pay for it. Searching for the things you’re uniquely qualified for, however, is often counter-productive, because these things usually find you after you’ve come alive.
- Fall Off the Bandwagon: In The Matrix, "Neo" takes a red pill that makes him see his world’s faults. In our world, a simple pill can’t do this and we need to work hard to see the societally constructed treadmill of life for what it is. Falling off the bandwagon often involves midlife and existential crises, or just a deep sense of apathy and hunger for more. Chances are, if you’re getting paid for being someone other than yourself, then this won’t be a problem.
- Look Inside: Many of us have been implicitly encouraged to look outside ourselves, find talents and skillsets deemed valuable by the marketplace, and then produce those talents on demand. This is unhelpful; the best approach is to be aware of external problems and issues while listening to ourselves and following our strengths and passions. As Howard Thurman says in the introductory quotation, "Don’t worry about what the world needs, ask what makes you come alive and do that because what the world needs are people who have come alive."
- Come Alive: When we’re living with complete authenticity, we no longer have to search for our passions, callings, or vocations because these things instead find us. It often starts with tinkering around the house, spurts of creativity, and high levels of excitement. It starts with a vision that no one else has to buy into because you endorse your own irrationality. When you’ve come alive there’s no need for others to pat you on the back and encourage you. You’re too busy being you to even care. When you’ve come alive, your passion, creativity, and enthusiasm will make confidence a non-issue.
- Stay True to Yourself: Many people are willing to quit their jobs, go into debt, and make other large sacrifices to attend university in preparation for a new career. Far fewer people, however, are willing to quit jobs or transition from full-time to part time work for unsanctioned and "crazy" ideas. If going back to school is what you need to do, then do it, but most of the time you have all the solutions within.
- Make time: Authentic development of you and your passions takes time. If you work 4 jobs, are on 6 committees, and are ruled by busyness then you’ll have little time for developing your unique skills. My advice is to do whatever necessary, short of neglecting children and significant others, to free up time for the important. You might need to drop off several committees, stop checking email, and significantly decrease your work hours. Most people can thrive on much, much, less than they have and can create real opportunities when they give up false security blankets. The good news it that these sacrifices are usually worth it.
These 6 keys may or may not lead to millionaire or multi-millionaire status. They will, however, bring you to actualize the value inherent in your own unique abilities and passions, and this value will be more than worthy of remuneration.
“Clarity of mind means clarity of passion, too; this is why a great and clear mind loves ardently and sees distinctly what he loves.”
–Blaise Pascal
[tags]career guide, quitting your job, employment advice, realizing your potential, Kimya Dawson, coming alive, Howard Thurman[/tags]
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Clay
This is a really inspirational article and it has a depth and a uniqueness that can only come when someone writes from their heart. I really needed to read this today so thanks for sharing.
I love Kimya’s song too. I’ve never heard of her, but I recognise her voice from Juno. Such a beautiful movie. And I think she’s a very lucky woman to have a mother who encouraged her to be true to herself and find her answers within.
Most of our parents love us so much their fear kicks in when we are choosing our future. They push us in directions they think will be “good” for us. The important thing to remember is WE always know what’s good for us.
Abraham-Hicks says the secret to gettign what you want in life is “Follow your bliss”, and I try to remind myself of that every time I start swamping myself with outside obligations.
Cheers
Kelly
Great post, Clay. Too often we try to flourish by being something we’re not and instead whither in the shell we don’t fit into. Too many of us also confuse being good at something with that something being good for us to do.
The sad thing is how scared people become when they cut off the unimportant because they don’t know what to fill it back up with. Societies focused on the outside have forgotten to teach us how to retreat to ourselves.
Keep up the great work! Good job on scoring the guest post on Write to Done, as well!
Hi Clay,
I’m realizing #6: Making Time right now myself.
I’m self-employed, so I suppose I’ve accomplished a few of the other keys.
At the same time, a lot of my time and energy goes into running my business, but recently I realized I need to devote time and energy into my family, and even for myself as well.
Recently, I’ve even started reading more again, usually an 30-60 minutes in bed until I’m sleepy.
Thanks for the reminders.
See, now that’s pretty awesome. I ALWAYS thought I should be paid for being JEMi 
lol
Clay, this is an inspirational piece, very worthy of the stumble thumb. You make a lot of great points – my favorite being tip 1 – realize your potential. When I came alive, a few of my personal talents kind of screamed at me. Always been there but never really actualized or cultivated because I am unbelievably talented at downplaying the things I can do to others and to myself.
And you’re right – it’s “easier” to quit everything and go back to school than trying a new idea that you know just might be crazy enough to work. It’s that risk factor- that fear. That’s one of the big examples of trusting yourself and your instinct – which is hard to do when you haven’t honestly experienced your true sense of self yet.
Ok I lied – I love tip 4 as well.
Ditto – great work Clay as expected of course!
Cool song! Did you catch the Super Mario Brothers reference? How do you embed music clips like that?
And of course, great post as usual. Getting paid for being me is exactly what I’m trying to do!
Clay, I’ve read everything on your blog and loved it. This, however, is the best. Awesome stuff. If I could Stumble it twice, I would.
I think the two worst mistakes are:
1. chasing a strength that’s not a passion
2. focusing on your weaknesses over strengths
I think the proven practices are:
1. play to your passion
2. know your strengths
3. reduce your liabilities
The strength trap is easy to fall into. The trap is you get rewarded for your strength, so you keep doing it, even though you don’t enjoy it. The fix is turn your passions into strengths.
I think the most insightful book I read on finding your strengths is Now Discover Your Strengths. It’s a unique catalog of strengths that gives you a new lens on your capabilities.
@J.D.: I really agree with you about the “chasing a strength that
@Hunter: Yea, that Mario Bros. reference is great. Something about jumping in the pipe and going straight to level 8 I think? Are you coming out as a former geek ?
@JEMi: Yeah, you would except to be paid for being JEMi . And you should, too, Ms. Bada$$.
@ Nez: Yeah, working from home is great because you save on commutes, food, and MEETINGS. I’ll email you offline about your new business.
@ Charlie: “Too many of us also confuse being good at something with that something being good for us to do.” Very true. Or we might really be passionate about the things we’re good at and an employer or school or whatever bastardizes it, transforming the task by making it repetitive or otherwise stripping out the creative components, which is unfortunate.
@Kelly: I like that “follow your bliss” quotation. Truly. When you’ve found your bliss the unimportant seems so much less relevant and motivation for the mundane obligatorily melts away at a scary pace. Frightening but good sometimes.
Clay, you just pointed out how to avoid frustration. People to often start from high goals instead of concentrating on themselves first. Today’s world is very demanding and suggests we should do things that are not OUR things. It is worth being aware of this toxic influence.
Clay, I think the geeks are the ones who DIDN’T play Super Mario Bros!
“These 6 keys may or may not lead to millionaire or multi-millionaire status. They will, however, bring you to actualize the value inherent in your own unique abilities and passions, and this value will be more than worthy of remuneration.”
Your conclusion above is so right!!! Love your post! Stumbled and Dugg!
With much thanks and appreciation,
Evelyn
I agree! People are so quick to quit their jobs for college which is only a promise of a better future, not a guarantee. Why can’t you do the same for your own business? It is exactly the same! You get whatever you get from the time you put into it and the commitment you make.
Clay, this is a really important post. I think many people feel like they don’t have a passion or any kind of unique purpose in this world and that’s why they chase things outside of themselves. Knowing what that passion is a huge, difficult first step.
@Amanda: I agree. I think finding your passion requires a lot of stress free playful time, and it takes a lot of sacrifice to create that for yourself. The trouble is that lots of people don’t have faith that if they created the free time they wouldn’t end up being lazy and poor. So faith is huge .
Some may enjoy the webcomic I made for this article.
http://mojo1000.com/1000cuts/following-your-passion.html
@MonkMojo: Love the webcomic! Your “silly-putty and jelly sandwich for the soul” blog is also pretty fantastic. Quite the mashup.
@ Hunter: I used the audio player plugin. Love it!
Clay, your writing comes off as someone who has had a lot if real life experience, but what I think is that you’ve not only been given an incredible gift of insight, you’ve also given your own time to cultivate it and think deeply about these subjects. If we could all take a tip from you and simply slow down and not fill every waking moment with distractions…
Like Alanna Morisett (sp?) sings in her song You Oughtta Know: “here, can ya handle this…” (long 2-3 seconds of silence) “did you think about your bills, your ex, your deadlines, or when you think your gonna die, or did you long for the next distraction?”
At least I think that’s the song title.
Great blog.
@Damon: I’m truly touched by these very kind words. Thank you.
there are restriction to what you will get paid eventually depending on your educational history. But if you have potential and act as yourself, you will get paid better because people just like you better. That’s my experience..
Hi,
Unfortunately, my parents all they wanted was to go to college, get a degree and a good job. And I think most parents do this mistake.
I agree that if you do what you love you will eventually be paid better. But as you said it’s very difficult to find your true passion, especially when you have a good paying job. And if you are not good at what you love?
As another reader said “The trap is you get rewarded for your strength, so you keep doing it, even though you don
Clay,
Great post- I agree that “society scripted routes to success are failing us”… Unfortunately, many people stay too busy to really even find out what makes them come alive. And when they do take time to reflect, they often don’t take action. And when they do take action, they often stop at the first sign of failure. So there are lots of obstacles on the way, and that’s why it’s so important to do what you love- because if you aren’t doing that, chances are you’ll get stuck at one of those obstacles before you see results/”get paid for being you”.
I’ve really been enjoying reading through your blog archives- your posts are consistently well-written and insightful. Keep it up!
i think the trick is to present yourself in a way that people recognize has value and to charge accordingly.
wow…great thought. It’s not only about being unique, but being able to use it in a strategical way.
AJ Kumar
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Doing the things that will make ou happy and worth trying for is the best career an individual can have
hi guide a family to have a career, getting pregnant is not always as easy as it might seem. … When we hadn't gotten pregnant after six months, we finally paid a visit
I loved “The Matrix”! It was an awesome movie that was very thought-provoking. Nice article!